Despite all eight million outcomes of a life, it seems like mine is supposed to be here

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i’ve been wondering if i’m supposed to settle for someone or not trust my gut & shame myself for not having feelings for someone – like I should even though I don’t… I think it stems from a concern that I will never meet someone with the level of understanding & friendship that i’m dreaming of. but then I was listening to this song about this girl who met someone that feels perfect & right & I was like, I mean every love song in the world can’t be lying right. & then I decided that it’s just going to have to stem from faith. & for the time being, i’m going to trust my gut with these things & stop stringing things along that I know ultimately don’t feel right. so I guess you could say i’ve had this hesitant conviction to not lead men on so much. dot dot dot. eek. I can be selective, I rlly can. & not just go with the flow. I think I need to just do less going w the flow in general. nothing wrong w being a girl who knows what she wants. & I feel like in life & overall, I have a pretty decent idea of what I want.

https://mpru.me/2021/06/12/raw (visited 2021-06-12)

I want to share the happiness I feel

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I want the world to feel that way too. It can be a bit much for some, but I realize that if I am feeling all of this goodness within myself, why wouldn’t I want to share it with others. It’s just like if you found a really good restaurant with great food, and service, wouldn’t you want to share that with others? It is an analogy, however, that is what it feels like for me.

https://theinsightofanaquarian.wordpress.com/2021/06/03/be-the-first-to-smile

I’m starting to think I want to have a daughter someday

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Somehow this reminds me of our connection to God, whoever that may be. I nurture my puppy, and she nurtures me. God nurtures me, so I can nurture my puppy. And I please God by doing good deeds and loving others. Love is what connects us all to one another, and love is that feeling of happiness when you discover how much that person or dog’s existence means to you. Someone once explained to me: perfect circles don’t exist in nature, but we know that they exist. In the same way, there must be a perfect version of a person, and the journey of becoming closer to that person, or God, is what life is for. That made a lot of sense to me.

https://pinkestsummer.wordpress.com/2021/05/16/self-awareness

Studying astrology and the zodiac makes me feel like I’m part of something

Keywords: sleep , being alone , found , free writing , lonely , lost , my thoughts , sleep , sleep experiment

The number one way to not feel sorry for oneself is to give to another person. Giving to someone else is the best way to not be bored, and to get your head out of “me”. I sleep to gain a better insight into who I am and what I can do. I feel sorry for myself because I get bored. I get bored because I’m lonely. I’m lonely because I’m alone. I love to be alone… So it’s my own fault that I feel lonely.

https://sleepmorelivemoreexperiment.wordpress.com/2021/04/26/thoughts-on-sleep

I read my books, watch the shows/movies I love, I eat what I want, & I do what I want (which isn’t much)

Keywords: lifestyle , blessed , blog update , bloggerlife , christmas decorating , christmas time , dont understand people , god is good , love my life , true to myself , wordpress

listening to my sister & mom talk about how they need to lose weight & color my mom’s hair & all this because of guys. That just bugged me, I am the type of person who will do something for myself & not for a guy. Well also because I am single & will be single forever. It’s like I want to tell them do what they want for themselves and not for some guy. I just don’t understand them. My grandma isn’t like that at all, she is like me, she will do things because she wants to not because she wants to impress my grandpa. Even when they first started dating she wasn’t like that at all, I’ve heard the stories. haha That is one of the things that made my grandpa fall for her.

https://lifeofjesusita.wordpress.com/2020/12/10/being-true-loving-myself